Doing Taxes is like Serving on Jury Duty

Apr 14, 2014

… or a root canal

… or a bout of food poisoning

… or a pimple in your nose

… or a hang-nail

… or an earache

… or a busted timing-belt

… or a (fill in the blank)

 

Ultimately, nobody likes to do it, yet it has to be done.

 

However, when it comes to jury duty – you can always try to make excuses to get out of serving.  Can’t do that with taxes.  Can you imagine your blank tax form with an attached letter “Please excuse Rodney Lee from submitting his taxes as he is needed to complete an important project at work“.

 

On the other hand, unlike taxes where you can take it to an accountant to have them done for you, that can’t be pulled with jury duty.  “Your honor, my name is Joe Blow from ‘JurorsRUs‘ and I was hired to serve as a juror for my client, Rodney Lee.”

 

Can you imagine…

 

But really, isn’t it all about attitude?  I mean, think about it.  It could be a fun thing, if you allow it to be.  I always hated jury duty because that was the normal reaction to serving.  That is until at an old job of mine, my boss got called to serve for jury duty and she wanted to get selected because she thought it would be so cool to see the trial and how everything unfolds.  But being as truthful as she was, she was dismissed from the jury selection because she honestly had some preconceived thoughts about the case.  And she was kinda bummed out.

 

That changed my thinking and I could almost not wait to get a summons to serve for jury duty.  And both times I was selected to serve!  I wouldn’t say that I was elated, but I was a bit excited to see the court in action.  And see one of the cases all the way though.

 

Now, if I can only get excited about doing my taxes.  Turbo Tax does make it easy, and a little bit fun.  And getting a return is always a happy ending.  But if you have to pay…  Then it’s no fun.  But then again, that’s part of the beauty of doing taxes – you won’t know if you’re going to have a happy ending or a sad one until you’ve plugged in all the numbers.

 

So… since it has to be done – why not take the “glass is half-full” attitude and make the best of it.  I’m going to do so starting right now!  And since I’ve finished doing my taxes – and my 2 daughters’ taxes – I can’t wait until this year is over so I can start gathering all the W2’s and 1099’s and spending money to buy an updated version of Turbo Tax and spend countless hours plugging in numbers, and searching to make sure I entered all the forms, and hoping that I’m doing it right so the IRS doesn’t send me that dreaded letter, and getting more gray hairs.  Can you sense my elation?

 

Okay, I’m still working on the attitude thing…

 

Doing Taxes is like Serving on Jury Duty:

 

… or fighting the flu

… or having the runs

… or losing your phone

… or waking up with a stye

… or (you fill in the blanks)

 

*****************************************************

 

Okay MLCers – here’s your chance to dance to some old-school LIVE music.  The Magic Mushroom Reunion IV dance party at the Manoa Grand Ballroom on May 17th.  That’s the weekend BEFORE the big graduation weekend so no try use that excuse.  Line up is: White Light with the full horn section and lead singer Joy (she is such a babe!), New Experience 2 (you may know them as the band that turned into The Krush), and Audissey and friends (including Rob Yamamoto from Natural High).  Tickets are just $30 with heavy pupus (also known as dinner for us MLCers).  Get your tickets soon!

20140517MMR4

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185 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. Makiki
    April 14th, 2014 at 4:16 am #

    The best is if you have to pay a little bit since then you got the best value from the situation. Why give the government a free loan?

  2. KAN
    April 14th, 2014 at 5:36 am #

    Doing taxes/enduring jury duty is like flying on a plane with a screaming baby in the seat behind you.

  3. KAN
    April 14th, 2014 at 5:36 am #

    Doing taxes/enduring jury duty is like slamming your head with a hammer – feels so good when it’s pau.

  4. KAN
    April 14th, 2014 at 5:37 am #

    Doing taxes/enduring jury duty is like going to work on Monday mornings. :-/

  5. 4G
    April 14th, 2014 at 5:51 am #

    I guess it’s a matter of perspective. LOL. Retired people seem to really enjoy doing jury duty. ;)

  6. 4G
    April 14th, 2014 at 5:53 am #

    Doing taxes is like getting your wisdom teeth pulled. NOT! LOL.

    But, what is up with all these people going to the dentist and not coming back? Geez. Getting wisdom teeth pulled used to be a painful, traumatic ordeal – but I don’t recall hearing about people dying!

  7. M
    April 14th, 2014 at 6:31 am #

    Guud morning MLCres!
    If you do your taxes early the pain is less.

  8. khs68
    April 14th, 2014 at 8:28 am #

    Actually…I’d rather do taxes than change the grandkid’s doo doo diaper. “Take care the kid, honey. I busy doing the taxes.” :lol:

  9. Masako
    April 14th, 2014 at 8:57 am #

    Good Morning! As much as doing taxes is a pain in the butt, I like the result, we get a refund so overall I don’t mind. The pain part is doing my kids taxes. Well I least I get my money’s worth from Turbo Tax.

  10. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 9:43 am #

    Easy solution. Think you fellas should do this when you want to avoid preparing your tax return. Have your spouse do it. Hey, that’s what the wife did to me. She made me do it. For me, doing taxes is like having to wipe after getting diarrhea, OUCH!!!

    Been the foreman of the jury one time. Thought about it when I got selected. Some of these people here don’t want to work and don’t care how long the trial lasts. So I manned-up and volunteered to be the foreman. Towards the end, had to convince 1 person to swing their vote. It worked. Trial was over in 1 day. Problem solved.

  11. LINDA KATO
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:11 am #

    Good morning MLCers :!: Happy Monday :!: :grin:

    Have a great day everyone :!: :grin:

  12. LINDA KATO
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:16 am #

    We did our taxes 3 weeks ago, had to pay IRS but I won a lot in VEGAS in 2/2014 so I used part of my winning to pay that tab :!:

    Have a small refund from the State of Hawaii, not holding my breath to see when that will be dropped into my checking account…. as of today it’s not yet there :!: Hoping it hits before our next trip to VEGAS next month, if not, I saved several thousand dollars from the prior win for our next trip :!: All is good with us :!: We’ve been blessed :!: :grin:

    We pay estimated taxes quarterly and we’re retired :!: I tell myself, if we have to pay, that means we have more than enough to live on so rather than complain, I count my blessings that we live in a wonderful country the U.S.A, are healthy, and have the money to pay our taxes. No complaints from this household.

    Hubby was called to jury duty the week before our last VEGAS trip…. the judge would not excuse him from serving, he was told it would wrap up before we left…. and it did :!: Everything worked out for everyone :!: :grin:

  13. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:23 am #

    Doing taxes is like wearing BBD’s with holes in ‘em–it’s annoying!

  14. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:24 am #

    Doing taxes is like eating a plate lunch and towards the end, you find a hair in it–gross!

  15. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:26 am #

    Doing taxes is like double-dating in college. Sometimes, you end up with the “dog” while you can’t take your eyes off your friend’s date.

  16. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:28 am #

    Doing taxes is like getting a hang-over the next morning. Someone, please get me the Advil. Now!

  17. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:30 am #

    Doing taxes is like stepping of dog dodo on your good slippers. Not good anymore!

  18. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:34 am #

    Doing taxes is the opposite of ear-wax. Head feels 10 lbs. lighter when it finally comes out.

  19. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:39 am #

    Doing taxes is like ‘gon pi’ in the bushes. Someone walks by unexpectedly and you have to stop half-way. Hate it! :lol:

  20. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:41 am #

    Doing taxes is like watching the Super Bowl and the wife tells you you need to go on a Costco run. Fogit-abol-it.

  21. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:46 am #

    Doing taxes is like not having enough roughage and waiting. Tomorrow never comes!

  22. Lowtone123
    April 14th, 2014 at 10:58 am #

    Having constipation. You know you have to do it, it is painful while you are doing it but it feels so good when it’s over.

  23. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:09 am #

    Doing taxes is like going to a movie you already saw. Is it done yet?

  24. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:13 am #

    Doing taxes is like fighting with your spouse. You were so p.o.’ed spouting off and, later, you remember that you forgot to say something ‘mean’. No can win!

  25. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:27 am #

    Doing taxes is like remembering you still have that bag of chips from Costco you started eating the other day. But there’s only 5 pieces left in the bag. WTH? Who ate this last? For Pete’s sake, finish it if you going only leave 5 pieces! But dad, we can’t eat as much as you in 1 sitting. Sheesh, still no can win.

  26. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:31 am #

    Doing taxes is like not enough toilet paper on the roll when you reach out to wipe. Too late, can’t undo it.

  27. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:37 am #

    Doing taxes is like going to the doctor for antibiotics and he tells you it’s only a virus. Help, I feel sick, Doc!

  28. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:39 am #

    Doing taxes is like getting a cost-of-living raise. What, brah, thanks for the extra plate lunch, eh? So ungrateful!

  29. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:40 am #

    Doing taxes is like opening a can of soda and there’s no fizz. Flat tire!

  30. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:42 am #

    Doing taxes is like getting a work assignment at 4:40 in the afternoon. Brah, ever heard of Miller time?

  31. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:45 am #

    Doing taxes is like running into an old GF at Jack-In-The-Box and she gives you that sexy smile. It hurts!

  32. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:48 am #

    Doing taxes is like eating saimin with no green onions. It’s not the same!

  33. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:50 am #

    Doing taxes is like walking past a good-looking man and not noticing. Miss out!

  34. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 11:54 am #

    Doing taxes is like having to pay for a Jamba juice that cost $5.19 but you only have $.18 in change. Hate that!

  35. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:06 pm #

    Doing taxes is like biting into a manapua and it turns out to be black-sugar instead of char siu. Yuk!

  36. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:08 pm #

    Doing taxes is like taking out the ‘green’ rubbish can out to the sidewalk when it is ‘blue’ rubbish can week. Sucks, just like filing a CA-540 tax form and finding out you should file the non-resident form instead.

  37. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:11 pm #

    Doing taxes is like sitting in Trigonometry class and you want to pick your nose but can’t. Breathe through your mouth!

  38. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:15 pm #

    Doing taxes is like waking up at 6:00 in the morning and forgetting it’s Saturday. Worse yet you went to bed at 10:00 the night before. Irritating!

  39. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:16 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to work. After a while, it becomes a pain-in-the-aSS!

  40. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:19 pm #

    Doing taxes is like taking your car in for a ‘motor mount’ replacement and finding out the ‘valve cover’ is leaking oil. What? You think money grows on trees? There goes the safety check.

  41. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 12:28 pm #

    Doing taxes is a lot like remembering ‘Fast and Loud’ starts at 9:00 but you forget what channel it’s on. Kind of like trying to out how to get TurboTax to calculate ‘earned income credit’. Mission Impossible.

  42. 4G
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:00 pm #

    Sooo, @Seawalker – safe to assume you don’t like doing taxes??? LOL. ;)

    Taxes are like life insurance. If you die early, you hit the jackpot – but then, you’re like dead! LOL. On the flipside, if you live long, you’re alive, but what did you pay all those premiums for? LOL!

  43. KAN
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:01 pm #

    I forgot about state income taxes. Washington doesn’t have ‘em, but we have really high state and local sales taxes.

  44. 4G
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:03 pm #

    I don’t get why your State tax refund from the prior year is considered income by the Federal government for the current year. Didn’t I already pay income tax on those earnings?

  45. Mark'75
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:12 pm #

    @khs68: I rather clean doodoo diaper :!: :lol:

    I view doing taxes as a necessary evil…like renewing vehicle registration.

    Court? nah…stale…

  46. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:16 pm #

    Eh, @4G… when you got all this pent-up anger in you… LOL

    For the state tax refund, if you used it as an itemized deduction the previous year, you have to include the refund as income the next year. In a perfect world, if you didn’t have a refund, but itemized the state taxes, then the IRS can’t mess with your mind. At least that’s what I heard.

  47. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:18 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to the KFS on Liliha and King and find out they changed to a Jollee Bee. I like eat chicken!

  48. 4G
    April 14th, 2014 at 1:50 pm #

    Eh, @Seawalker – I thought Jollibee has fried chicken? :P

  49. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:23 pm #

    Think you right, @4G. Getting mixed up with Max’s of Manila. They must get fried chicken, too. Was driving by the other day and noticed the change. Don’t think they’re opened yet. Man, better turn down my radio and concentrate when I drive. LOL

  50. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:25 pm #

    Man, so overworked and underpaid. Day’s almost done, and haven’t even had time to complete anything. Thanks for the distraction of this blog, @Rod.

  51. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:27 pm #

    Doing taxes is like wearing a brand new aloha shirt from Costco. But WTH? Somebody in the office has the exact same shirt. Lose money.

  52. 4G
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:31 pm #

    Sooo – I heard Yvonne Elliman made a surprise appearance at the $50M Party. That must have been pretty cool, huh?

  53. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:41 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to the gas station and inadvertently filling up with the 92 octane pump instead of the the 87 octane pump. There goes the plate lunch money.

  54. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:44 pm #

    For gas weed whackers, buy non-ethanol gasoline. It’ll last longer in the red can. The chemicals weakens the gas over time. That’s what the Sears buggah told me. So doing taxes is like buying ethanol gasoline for your weed whacker. No holding power.

  55. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 2:57 pm #

    Doing taxes is like thinking you scored by buying Jasmine rice for cheap in Chinatown. Half-way through the bag, you find out there’s worms and you have to throw out the rest. Lose money, big-time!

  56. LINDA KATO
    April 14th, 2014 at 3:05 pm #

    Yes, Seawalker, we can guess that you do not like to do taxes :!:

    Went to the post office today….. crazy over there….. thought it was due to people mailing things for Easter…… hubby said, no, I think they are in line to pay taxes and want to make sure there is enough postage on the envelope :!: Since tomorrow is the due date…. that must be a reason for the huge crowd :!:

  57. hemajang
    April 14th, 2014 at 3:19 pm #

    I would take jury duty over doing taxes any day, I have been in the jury box twice and thought the whole process as interesting, good fun. I e-filed my federal today and money will be going out tomorrow, April 15th. I hate doing taxes. I had to pay big this year and wasn’t surprised. I remember asking the local social security guy if I should do a federal withholding on my social security benefit and he recommended no, that I can always adjust later after my retirement and my income is stable. Problem was I was still working and receiving social security for 4 months. Extra money was good but should have done withholding or estimated tax. I guess it is better to give my money on the last day rather than early. Ideally you want to owe a little rather than a refund, no?

  58. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 3:19 pm #

    Eh, howzit, @LK. If you are reporting gambling winnings, be sure to itemize your losses too. Don’t think the guidelines are that strict for self-reporting of losses. Losses can be reported up to the extent of winnings. Zippy meals are not deductible. j/k. Actually, you are right about me doing taxes. But I’m like the others, the satisfaction of getting it done and knowing you’re good for another year.

  59. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 3:43 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to the Ocean Club in the 90’s on ladies night and finding out there’s more guys than dolls. WTH?

  60. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 3:46 pm #

    Doing taxes is like spitting out gula-gula out the car window, but ends up going on to your car. Tough luck!

  61. BlueJade
    April 14th, 2014 at 5:11 pm #

    Just finished doing my mom’s taxes via turbo tax too. Doing taxes is just a tad below the root canal I had and the numbing did not work so I felt every root being stripped. Only a tad less painful. Turbo tax is expensive, cost $80 for both fed and state. Last year was more painful then that, when I had to do my late bro’s taxes and guess at certain things. Not to mention all the insurance and 401Ks (thankful for that) payouts mom rec’d that whopped up her income incredibly. So if you’re with a partner, kinda keep that stuff updated cuz you know what they say about Death and Taxes. Or die really poor.

  62. Rodney
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:22 pm #

    @BlueJade -Welcome to the MLC blog and thanks for commenting. Sorry to hear about your brother. When I was using Turbo Tax, I too read where there is a box asking whether the person had passed away within the tax year. Then I thought that it must be quite a challenge to do that person’s taxes. You’d think that maybe the government might give a break to those who’ve passed on.

  63. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:35 pm #

    Doing taxes is like getting a Colonoscopy. Self-explanatory. :lol:

  64. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:41 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to McDonald’s and super-sizing your takeout order except to find out that when you get back to the office, they forgot your french fries. No wonder they work McDonald’s!

  65. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:43 pm #

    Doing taxes is like shaving in the morning. After you get in the car, you notice there’e one long stubble that you missed. Too late, you filed already!

  66. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:47 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a windy day. Get plenty leaves on your lawn afterwards. Just like how you ‘jacked up’ charitable contributions on Schedule A. When does the statue of limitations lapse?

  67. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:48 pm #

    Doing taxes is like getting a hernia. Full of holes, just like my tax return.

  68. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:49 pm #

    Doing taxes is a lot like eating a piece of fat ‘kau yuk’. You still not satisfied.

  69. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:50 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a belly full of laughs. It ain’t going to be funny when you get audited.

  70. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:57 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a second-hand car. You kiss a$$ to get a paycheck, and you feel used and abused going home from work. Like how the jacka$$ first-owner wrecked the new car you now have, you’re constantly trying to repair things.

  71. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 7:59 pm #

    Doing taxes is like watching a chick-flick. You cry when you see the small refund TurboTax calculated.

  72. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 8:00 pm #

    Doing taxes is like taking a shower with no hot water. Cold, man, like those big bullies, the IRS.

  73. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 8:03 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to church and when the offering bucket comes around, you only have a $100 bill. Write an I.O.U. instead and turn it in.

  74. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 8:07 pm #

    Doing taxes is like pouring a concrete slab. Go ahead, pay estimated taxes. Guarans, you still short at the end of the year. No chance to change when the curing process is complete.

  75. Seawalker
    April 14th, 2014 at 8:09 pm #

    Eh, @4G. After Sum Dum Chet ‘gon pi’ and not wash his hands, he was the one who sold me the Jasmine rice. :lol:

  76. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:57 am #

    @Seawalker – is that what they refer to as, “Mo’ Ono”? LOL.

  77. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:00 am #

    Doing taxes is like hearing your ex nag you about something, worst yet your DIVORSED! :-).

  78. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:03 am #

    Doing taxes is like christmas time as small kid, your all excited about getting new toys and most all presents are clothes. :-(

  79. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:05 am #

    Doing taxes is like good sex you have to have many years of experience till you find it. :-)

  80. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:09 am #

    @4G,Seawalker,Rodney,LINDA KATO,Mark’75,KAN(puffing fo air) and everyone else. Howzit?

  81. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:26 am #

    @Hbh – How’s it hanging? Doing good on this end. :lol:

  82. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:26 am #

    Doing taxes is like a buck tooth. No matter how you hide it, the IRS will notice.

  83. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:28 am #

    Doing taxes is like not brushing your teeth. The IRS will smell you a mile away.

  84. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:30 am #

    Doing taxes is like forgetting to wash your t-shirt and wearing it again. You can only use that excuse once with the wife.

  85. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:33 am #

    Doing taxes is like a bad smile. The IRS don’t get turned on too often.

  86. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:34 am #

    Doing taxes is like getting a girl’s phone number. The IRS will get in touch with you somehow.

  87. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:35 am #

    Doing taxes is like bread. You’re toast if you get caught.

  88. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:38 am #

    Doing taxes is like having leftover wor gau gee mein in Chinatown. I can smell it on Sum Dum Chet’s breath. :lol:

  89. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:39 am #

    Doing taxes is like having harm ha (shrimp paste). Good with ong choy, but hard to hide. Sum Dum Chet had this also. :lol:

  90. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:40 am #

    Doing taxes is like shopping. Only happens once a year!

  91. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:15 am #

    Doing taxes is like the using the bathroom in the morning. Nobody wants to go after dad!

  92. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:16 am #

    Doing taxes is like snoring. Loud and proud!

  93. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:17 am #

    Doing taxes is like cancer. The cancer cells are in everyone’s body. It’s hard to hide things from the IRS.

  94. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:18 am #

    Doing taxes is like duck eggs with pork hash. Good on paper, but bad for the heart.

  95. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:20 am #

    Doing taxes is like having crab legs. Mess with them and they’ll clean your clock out.

  96. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:21 am #

    Doing taxes is like kissing. Only when you remember.

  97. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:21 am #

    Doing taxes is like holding hands. Nah, no need.

  98. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:23 am #

    Doing taxes is like being in Mexico. Hard to understand those dam(n)ed instructions.

  99. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:24 am #

    @Seawalker

    Guud uncle. Just watchin you smoke, `aka`aka :-)

  100. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:27 am #

    Doing taxes is like an ex girlfriend, everytime you see her it breaks your heart (sorry if i cocaroach this one? couldn’t rememba otherwise)

  101. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:27 am #

    Doing taxes is like a bad joke. Take notice.

    Two brothers, Ying and Yang, wandering down a street in America with arms full of purchases and cameras swinging from their necks, one of the brothers slips into the bank to exchange 30,000 yen into dollars.
    Ying: ‘I wan to change 30,000 yen for dollar, bow much I get?’
    Teller: ‘Oh, you will get $8000.’
    Ying: ‘Fank you very much.’
    Teller: ‘You’re welcome,’ and hands Ying the $8000.
    Ying and Yang carry on doing copious amounts of shopping until Yang says he is a little low on local currency.
    So Ying told Yang to go to the same bank and get a good deal. So off Yang goes.
    Yang: ‘I wan to change 30,000 yen for dollar. Now much I get?’
    Teller: ‘Oh, you will get $6000. ‘
    Yang: ‘Only $6000! But how cum my broffer, just a few hour ago, get $8000?’
    Teller: ‘Fluctuations.’
    Yang: ‘Well, fluck you Yankees too!’

    :lol:

  102. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:38 am #

    Doing taxes is like a flat tire, the tire is only guud if it filled up(tax return that is) ;-)

  103. Hbh
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:39 am #

    @Seawalker

    Got to rememba dat one. :-)

  104. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:46 am #

    Doing taxes is like moving to the mainland. They got IRS offices in all 50 states (I think).

  105. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:58 am #

    Doing taxes is like having the ‘runs’. They don’t audit you often, but once you get caught, they keep coming back. It’s a re-occuring problem!

  106. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 9:03 am #

    Doing taxes is like having a bagel. One hole to many. Need malasada instead!

  107. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 9:04 am #

    Doing taxes is like running a marathon. You can run, but you can’t hide.

  108. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 9:07 am #

    Doing taxes is like an overgrown moustache. The dorky-looking Texas handle bar will not cover your a$$ when it comes to disguises.

  109. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 9:19 am #

    Doing taxes is like being basketball player Labron James. No slam dunk when it comes to tax compliance.

  110. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 9:19 am #

    Doing taxes is like being alone and afraid. Ever wonder who’s reading this? LOL

  111. LINDA KATO
    April 15th, 2014 at 10:30 am #

    Good morning MLCer’s :!: Happy Tuesday :!: :grin:

    Happy Tax Day! Hope everyone completed their taxes by now :!:

    Have a great day everyone :!: :grin:

  112. LINDA KATO
    April 15th, 2014 at 10:34 am #

    @Seawalker, Hbh, 4G and everyone else who posted: Hello from LK :!:

    Our taxes were done several weeks ago and yes, I reported my VEGAS winnings for the ones I was given 1099’s for, the rest is a secret :!: :grin:

  113. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 12:45 pm #

    Doing taxes is like the Samoan Slap Dance. Nobody messes with the IRS and Samongys!

  114. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 1:32 pm #

    Doing taxes is like getting the flu. You feel like ‘krap’ trying to fight it.

  115. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 1:50 pm #

    @LK – Howdy! I hope that all is going well with you. No worry -your 1099 secret is safe with us! LOL.

    That @Seawalker is on some kind of roll with this topic, huh?

  116. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 1:56 pm #

    Doing your taxes is like following those “easy” assembly instructions for things like ready to assemble furniture that were written by people who are not native English speakers. Can’t understand the written instructions. But – the assembly instructions usually have pictures – not so with the tax instructions! :(

  117. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:08 pm #

    Paying taxes is like being on a bad date – it seems to never end! LOL.

  118. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:29 pm #

    There you are, @4G. So it is lesson learned not to shop in Chinatown then. But when I’m there, I go incognito and use the name Tse Wok Kuh. Blends right in with them. May I suggest, Pho Gee for yourself? Who knows, with a name like that, they might also give you a discount. Better go wash my hands now. :lol:

  119. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:31 pm #

    Doing taxes is like drinking a strong cup of tea. It leaves a bitter taste in your mouth.

  120. Pho Gee
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:32 pm #

    Those were lessons NOT to shop in Chinatown? Dang! I thought those were recommendations/endorsements! ;)

  121. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:33 pm #

    LOL – was trying to get cute. Now I’m in purgatory! LOL.

  122. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:33 pm #

    Paying taxes is like being a parent – it just never ends! LOL.

  123. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:34 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a flea bite. Itchy like h3ll, and you never know when it will come back to bite you in the a$$.

  124. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:37 pm #

    Doing taxes is like forgetting to zip your fly. Only real friends tell you ‘x-y-z’ (examine your zipper) and the IRS ain’t your friend.

  125. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:37 pm #

    Paying taxes is like trying to get rid the coqui frog or red fire ants. Just can’t seem to get rid of them guys . . . .

  126. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:38 pm #

    Thanks @Rod! @Seawalker – check out 2:32 post.

    Your friend,

    Pho Gee :)

  127. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:40 pm #

    Knock, knock.

    Who’s there?

    I-R-S.

    IRS who?

    Eyes are watching you!

    :lol:

  128. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 2:46 pm #

    Eh, @4G, remember this in elementary school?

    Pho Gee and Sum Dum Chet,
    Sitting on a wall,
    K-I-S-S-I-N-G,
    First comes love,
    Second comes marriage,
    Third comes Tse Wok Kuh and the baby carriage.

    :lol: long day, way too long!

  129. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 3:23 pm #

    @Seawalker – LOL @”Sitting on a wall”.

    Where I come from, it was, “Sitting in a tree . . . ” ;)

  130. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 3:27 pm #

    On the topic of taxes…

    What’s the difference between the Dept. of T@xation and a bucket of cr(a)p?

    If you must know… the bucket, of course! LOL

  131. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 3:29 pm #

    @4G – In Chinatown, you sit on a wall. Either that or you’re sitting on the toilet. :lol:

  132. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 3:35 pm #

    Doing taxes is like passing gas. Unpleasant to everyone.

  133. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 3:52 pm #

    Filing taxes is like working those benefit car washes. No matter what, you will get hosed at some point.

  134. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 4:06 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a Ige’s plate lunch. The more you eat, the heavier the price you end up paying.

  135. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 4:07 pm #

    Doing taxes is like looking at balut. Disgusting to even think about.

  136. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 4:08 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a bad heartburn. Then, when the pain moves to your intestines, it becomes full of $hit.

  137. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 4:12 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a missed field goal. No second chances!

  138. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 4:15 pm #

    Doing your taxes is like a mosquito. Blood thirsty and annoying as h3ll!

  139. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:33 pm #

    Look what I found… it’s the manapua man!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAa0aGv3b-Q&feature=youtu.be

  140. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:35 pm #

    Doing taxes is like vomit. You know it’s coming and you cannot do a darn thing about it.

  141. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:37 pm #

    Doing taxes is like Hawaii 5-0. Wo Fat’s got all the money!

  142. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:38 pm #

    Doing taxes is like dancing with a Korean chick at the disco. Do you wanna bugolgi? :lol:

  143. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:40 pm #

    Doing taxes is like sucking on a li hing mui. You just bite your lip and say nothing.

  144. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:41 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to a piano recital. You don’t give a $hit about the others except for your own.

  145. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:42 pm #

    Doing your taxes is like blowing your nose. Nothing good comes out of it.

  146. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:44 pm #

    Doing taxes is like taking lickins’ with the belt during hanabata days. You act like it doesn’t hurt, but it hurts like h3ll.

  147. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:45 pm #

    Doing taxes is like telling your boss to stick it where the sun don’t shine. No paycheck, no taxes to file.

  148. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:49 pm #

    Doing taxes is like fried rice. You don’t know where the h3ll your records are, just like the cook book ingredients.

  149. Mark'75
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:50 pm #

    @Seawalker: Wow, cool video!!! Thanks!

  150. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:53 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a hangnail. When push comes to shove, pay it.

  151. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:55 pm #

    @Mark – My bruddah from the mainland (of all places) sent it. Taxes come and gone for you too?

  152. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 5:57 pm #

    Doing taxes is like getting a ‘D’ on the mid-terms for History 151. Just cheat on the finals.

  153. ankleBYTERS
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:03 pm #

    Doing taxes is a heck of a lot better than listening to Cow Moooooosic….

  154. Mark'75
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:04 pm #

    Had a blast from the past moment today at lunch. I went to Kenny’s at Royal Hawaiian Shopping Center’s food court. Written on the Specials board was Porky Boy, Terry Beef King, Cheesy Gal, Suzy-Q, and all the others, served with fries. (Too bad wasn’t ’70s prices tho) I said, “Wow, Jolly Roger!!!” The counter lady asked, “You remembah?” I said, “Yeah!” and she gave me kamaaina discount! Score!

  155. ankleBYTERS
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:08 pm #

    Doing taxes has made more liars out of Americans than golf has….

  156. ankleBYTERS
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:13 pm #

    Doing taxes, one of life’s two certainties, is the only one that comes with an automatic extension….

  157. ankleBYTERS
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:15 pm #

    Doing taxes doesn’t come with an opt-out…you can’t request to be taken off their mailing list…

  158. ankleBYTERS
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:21 pm #

    <strong?Doing taxes will give you 1040 reasons to hate the government….

  159. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:27 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a screwdriver. It’s a matter of time before you get screwed!

  160. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:29 pm #

    Doing taxes is like playing centerfield in baseball. Audits don’t come often, but you better catch the ball when it gets hit to you.

  161. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:31 pm #

    Doing taxes is like being Liberty House. Bankruptcy won’t discharge all you owe.

  162. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:32 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a Kalihi cock fight. Winner gets the next cock to deal with.

  163. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:35 pm #

    Doing taxes is like going to jail. You play, you pay!

  164. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:37 pm #

    Doing taxes is like losing in the Powerball lottery. Only in your dreams.

  165. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 6:38 pm #

    Doing taxes is like tail-gating a bus. It gets you nowhere.

  166. 4G
    April 15th, 2014 at 7:03 pm #

    @Seawalker – thanks for that “Manapua Man” link! :)

    @Mark’75 – there’s a Kenny’s (or is it Jolly Roger’s?) at Royal Hawaiian Shopping Center? How was it?

  167. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:18 pm #

    Ok, @Pho Gee, only now I see it. LOL

    “Welcome to MLC blog, Grasshopper. UR ‘gon pi’ so I am filling in for him.”

    Yours truly,

    Tse Wok Kuh

    cc: @4G

  168. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:24 pm #

    Doing taxes is like getting a hickey. Those guys just won’t go away quickly.

  169. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:27 pm #

    Doing taxes is like vertigo. Only minor infractions and your head is spinning.

  170. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:34 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a toilet plunger. It’ll suck the life out of you.

  171. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:37 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a lollipop. It’ll make a sucker out you too.

  172. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:38 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a hula-hoop. You go around in circles.

  173. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:41 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a bolo knife. Feels like a stab in the back come tax time.

  174. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:45 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a eighth-carat diamond engagement ring. Do not expect it to last forever by being such a cheapskate to begin with.

  175. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:46 pm #

    Doing taxes is like Zippy’s fried chicken. Salty as h3ll, just like how you feel about those loafers at the Dept. of Tax(a)tion.

  176. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:49 pm #

    Doing taxes is like watching The Three Stooges. Even Larry, Curly and Moe are gentlemen compared to the IRS.

  177. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:52 pm #

    Doing taxes is appreciating a ‘small’ refund. Size matters to most Americans.

  178. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:56 pm #

    Doing taxes is like eating bittermelon. Smart Pakes loves that stuff, just like a tax loophole.

  179. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:57 pm #

    Doing taxes is like leasing a car. Only do that if you can get a write-off.

  180. Seawalker
    April 15th, 2014 at 8:58 pm #

    Doing taxes is like a smelly armpit. Taxes stink too!

  181. keoni
    April 15th, 2014 at 9:45 pm #

    Some of my friends refer to the agency as the “I Harass”!

  182. Mark'75
    April 16th, 2014 at 6:05 am #

    @4G: Kenny’s is good. The Cheesy Gal was like I remembered it. Resort kine prices tho.

  183. Makiki
    April 16th, 2014 at 6:32 am #

    “LINDA KATO
    Our taxes were done several weeks ago and yes, I reported my VEGAS winnings for the ones I was given 1099′s for, the rest is a secret :!: :grin:

    Not if you use your players card! Have you ever gotten your Win/Loss statement?

  184. 4G
    April 16th, 2014 at 7:06 am #

    @Mark’75 – thanks for sharing that information! :)

  185. khs68
    April 16th, 2014 at 11:51 am #

    Was so sad when the Jolly Roger next to Waialae Drive-In closed. Suzy-Q, french fries and strawberry slush float…sigh.